girls feeling

I feel very sad right now not because somebody broke my heart or because i am faced with some sort of problem. I am sad looking at myself. I am sad being myself. I am not writing this because i am looking for somebody to pity me or somebody to curse me. I am writing because i do not have anyone to share this disgust feeling. I am a selfish girl. i have always been a very selfish girl. And as of today i seriously hate myself. I have hurt many people with my selfishness and with my words. And as of today i do not even desire for any redemption! I have lost count of people i have hurt in the few decades of my life on earth. i have hurt my family, i have hurt my friends and i have hurt my beloved ones. I have seen them shed tears, crushed with the sword of my words. I have seen them make their effort just for the sake of someone like me. But what have i done? i have just plunged them in darkness. If i could, i would really end my life.. but won't it be just another form of my selfishness? I guess this is the only way to live now for i have sinned and i have to pay for my sins. I have to go through pain as a part of my punishment. I have to punish myself. Happiness existed a long time ago, it suffocated and died in my presence. My presence will only bring you sorrow yet i cannot end my own presence? i remorse not looking for salvation but for those smiles that were always dedicated to me! I am sorry everyone!

new generation confession

Heartbreak. I don’t think anyone can prepare you for the immense pain you will feel when it happens to you. You literally feel like you’re dying and that your life is over. You cry for hours at a time and it just won’t stop and it’s all you can think about. Can’t even listen to sad songs because they leave you in a puddle of tears. You go from sad to angry to alright back to sad in one day. It is an emotional roller coaster. You try to bargain with God. You text them and get to the point of practically begging. If they see how hurt I am they will want to fix this. Everyone try’s to give you encouraging words. “It will get better” “you will love again” and my all time favorite “all that works is time” you are craving for someone to tell you something to make it better. And you don’t believe anyone when they tell you those things. You think im gonna be this destroyed forever. You look online at articles and save quotes on how you’re feeling. You look at how to get your ex boyfriend back. But a point comes when you have to just stop. You have to put down the phone because most likely whenever you text them there not gonna say sorry and that they fucked up and that you can go back to normal. You just end up getting more hurt. So block him from everything. There are days when you reach for your phone and want to text him so bad but don’t. Write it down, cry it out and give it 10 minutes cause I guarantee you’ll feel a little better. I don’t care if you’re at work go to the bathroom and let it out whenever you need to. You’ll go from crying for hours straight, to maybe 10 minutes a day. Which doesn’t seem that great but it means you’re slowly getting better. You have to put one foot infront of the other each day and believe me I know how tough it is. You’ll have days where you’re sad all day and you’ll have days where you’re in a pretty good mood and don’t think too in depth about it.

Confession of a helpless brother

1. 
   

It had been days since she hadn't eaten properly. She would just stare at the food like it was a mystery and her eyes were supposed to solve it. When anyone touched her, she would jerk in awe and gulp everything in the plate in a haste. It was painful of a sight to watch Resha, a food lover lose interest in eating. Food wasn't the only struggle of her life those days. She had started a battle against sleep,laughter and precisely,herself.

Resha was just 18. The teenage hormones were taking a toll on her. She loved a guy who was probably of my age i.e. 4 years senior to her. She never talked to me about him though. Maybe she thought that I would scold her or complain it to Dad that she was into someone at that early age. How I wish she had taken the courage to speak up to me. How I wish I had created a comfort zone for my sister to share all those with me before it was too late.

As I mentioned earlier , my sister loved a guy. I am not sure about love since taking in mind her age and her maturity level , it could be mere infatuation. Anyways , she was into a guy who was a total hunk at college. He was her friend's brother. With guts and might , she approached him and poured her heart out but what she got in response was far from her expectation. That guy could have respected her feelings atleast or even in the worst case, he could have said a direct ""No"" and closed the topic but he made a joke out of her infront of his friends. What he did was , he laughed at her and shouted at her for having the nerves to propose a guy like him. "" ta jasto moti lai kosaile herda ta herdaina taile malai propose garne? "" These were the harsh words he projected at her as per the clarifications she mentioned in her diary. He humiliated her in social media and demeaned her self esteem to that level that she ended herself. Her immature mind and heart couldn't bear the pain of rejection and humiliation. My sister cut her veins was found in a pool of blood one evening. After beholding that sight , what happened to me and my parents can't be explained in words.

It is not that I didn't try helping my sister at all. Though I was not aware of what had exactly happened to her , I had received a hint that she was in despair. I did my level best in cheering her up and asking her about what had actually hurt her soul but all in vain. She never spoke to me as she was already into depression. Had I been close to her since the very beginning , maybe I could have saved her. Had I been a friend to her rather than a strict brother scolding her when she talked to any guy or didn't study , maybe we wouldn't have seen this day. Till today , I think of myself as a helpless brother filled with guilt.

Teenagers are always vulnerable towards taking wrong decisions. They take small things in mind and hurt themselves. This confession is to all those teens reading this :-
Please do not fall weak over anything. You are a strong person. If someone rejects you or defames you over your looks , please have the guts to defend yourself and say it loud and clear that : "" I am not only my physical appearance but the soul that resides inside me. Don't comment on me on things that I can't control but have been given by birth. I am my own version of beautiful. "" Infact people like that don't deserve to be in your life so , refrain from them. Remember , no one holds the power to destroy you . You need to stay strong for yourself , your family and the ones who love you.

And , to the elder brothers/sisters , parents reading this : Please create a comfortable platform for your teen siblings/children to talk to you and share things. You must scold them if they are wrong but you can do it in a subtle way too. Always staying strict can never let them open up to you .

This is all I wanted to say. Thanks for going through a long confession. smile emoticon

Wreckage found in Nepal of missing passenger plane with 23 people, including two foreigners, on board

Authorities say there were no survivors after wreckage located of small plane heading from resort town of Pokhara to trekking hub of Jomsom

The plane was heading to Jomsom, the starting point for trekkers going into mountainous areas

The wreckage of a small passenger plane with 20 passengers and three crew on board has been found near the Himalayas in Nepal, with no sign of survivors.

The plane disappeared earlier on Wednesday as it flew in poor visibility over mountainous terrain. Nepali media said there were two foreigners on board - believed to be a Kuwaiti and a female Chinese tourist from Honk Kong.

The Foreign Office said that were no British nationals on board, although the Associated Press had reported that a Briton was believed to be among the passengers. There were also two babies listed on the manifest.

Tara Air, the carrier, said rescue helicopters had been deployed to search for the Twin Otter aircraft, which lost contact with air traffic control eight minutes after it left the western town of Pokhara on Wednesday morning.

"A plane that took off from Pokhara for Jomsom this morning is out of contact," Tara Air spokesman Bhim Raj Rai told AFP.

20 most popular news portals of Nepal

I had compiled a list of 10 most popular blogs of Nepal last February which was well received. This time, I have compiled a list of 20 most popular news portals of Nepal.

As the world is increasingly relying on internet for its dose of news and information, online news sites are slowly but steadily snatching the share of readership from traditional media sources like newspapers and magazines. Nepal already has a abundance of online news sites. But what are the most popular ones and what does the overall scenario tell us?

Here are the top 20 most popular news portals of Nepal (based on Alexa.com's rankings):

1. Online Khabar 
Rank among Nepali Websites: 7
Overall Rank in Alexa: 9357



 2.Ekantipur
Rank among Nepali Websites: 10
Overall Rank in Alexa: 8338

3. Nagarik News
Rank among Nepali Websites: 13
Overall Rank in Alexa: 12,886


4. Seto Pati
Rank among Nepali Websites: 22
Overall Rank in Alexa: 170,573

Nepal To Rebuild Historic Dharahara Tower

Dharahara tower was turned into rubble during the April 2015 earthquake. 

KATHMANDU:  Nepal has decided to rebuild on its own the historic Dharahara tower that was turned into rubble during the April 2015 earthquake.

Prime Minister KP Sharma Oli and his Cabinet ministers today decided to contribute their one month's salary as seed money to rebuild the monument.

A citizens fund will be established under the campaign "I will construct Dharahara" from Wednesday that will contribute towards the reconstruction...........

new generation confession

Sometimes when i see people in relationship, i feel bad for myself. I am single and kaile ni relationship ma thina. 0 boyfriends till date. Ma ma k xa kami vanne sochxu. Then i remember all those time when i rejected proposals from boys and regret it. I look at them and think, oh i missed a good one. But then again i think about all those times when my classmates were crying over some fights with their gf/bf and i was in my own world, happy on my own. Yeah i do feel jealous of people in relationship but then i try to make myself feel good by counting the merits of being single. And when people say that you are single because you can't get a guy, it hurts. I look everyday in the mirror and tell myself that i'm beautiful but when i go out and i get taunts from people for being single, i lose all my confidence. Thats why i choose to stay away from the crowd. I have these walls built all around and its hard to let people in. I don't like it when i have to go meet people and chat and all. People say i am boring ang no one would date a girl like me. Well, there goes my confidence down the drain again. Some guys try to use this to their advantage. They flirt and flatter me and think i will fall for it. I am talking from experience.

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